Huma Abedin's personal essay for the September issue of Harper's Bazaar
plays out an all-too-familiar scene in the theater of sex and politics.
In this cast, there are only two characters: the Good Wife and the
Better Man. In the article, Abedin christens her husband, New York City
mayoral candidate Anthony Weiner "a better man" who pushed through his
past mistakes (which, by now, we all know of). And in a telling
editorial decision, the magazine titles the article and by proxy Abedin
herself as "The Good Wife," one who has remained faithful by his side
through it all.
It's a clean, PR-friendly image. This article was written and published online before the nation was introduced to Carlos Danger.
And now that Weiner's public vows to abandon his sexting exploits with other women have resurfaced as, shall we say, less than sincere,
it's difficult to tell which of the couple is more infamous. The
typecasts are quickly deteriorating, as America can't seem to make up
its mind whether it's more outraged by Carlos Danger for straying, or
The Good Wife for staying.
Countless motives have been ascribed to Abedin for "standing by her
man"—that she's staying as a boost to her own political career, that her
Muslim faith or Saudi Arabian upbringing compels her to leave divorce
out of the options, that she's following in the footsteps of Hillary
Clinton's example. We'll never know.
What can be said of Abedin, however, is that she did something many
other politico's wives in similar situations did not. At a press
conference with her husband, Abedin exercised a quality I admire in any
woman: raising her own voice. She articulated to the press that hers is a
personal decision she made "for me, for our son, and for our family."
But what happened next is where her position becomes problematic.
Because in the next breath, Abedin extended her own choice to forgive
and stand by her unfaithful husband as a prescriptive for all—for
voters, for national viewers, and perhaps most dangerously, for all
women who have ever found themselves in a cycle of broken trust.
This line of thought is consistent with her Bazaar essay, in which she invites readers to join her in the ranks of The Good Wife, even infusing her choice with moral force:
New Yorkers will have to decide for themselves whether or not to give him a second chance. I had to make that same decision for myself, for my son, for our family. And I know in my heart that I made the right one.
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